Here's the thing about social anxiety... it's frustrating!
Yes, social anxiety is normal and everyone feels it at some point, but we're not talking about the normal social anxiety most people feel.
We're talking about the kind that makes you feel like people are judging you, causing you to always concern yourself with what others think of you.
The kind that makes you over-think everything and makes it difficult to concentrate on work or on what people are saying to you.
Sometimes, it causes us to feel so uncomfortable, we find the closest exit and do everything we can to escape the entire situation.
But, even after making a run for it, social anxiety shows up again causing you to dwell on things you think you did wrong.
It causes you to feel apprehensive, self-conscious, fearful and inferior to those normal guys.
The social anxiety we deal with causes us to feel isolated and may have convinced you that something is wrong with you.
It's as if social anxiety creates a huge wall in our minds, keeping us from being normal.
Hi! I'm Aaron J. Kelley
I’m the founder Discarded Anxiety.
I know what it’s like to feel socially awkward and struggle to find words to speak in the simplest of conversations.
I’ve had my hands get sweaty, my heart beating out of my chest, and my mind go completely blank while people were waiting for me to speak.
I’ve even chosen to shy away from things I really wanted because I was too afraid of what others might think of me.
But I also know what it’s like to want to get over social anxiety, and how aggravating the process can be.
I understand that feeling of being fed up with yourself and how you respond to those anxiety inducing situations.
I’ve been there and I'm here to tell you...
You don't have to stay there.
A few years ago, I decided I was not going to let my social anxiety hold me back any more.
So, I set out to re-educate myself on things I'd learned in the past but never implemented to try and pull myself out of my social anxiety prison.
I went back and started reading my old text books about human development, sociology, and psychology from the University of Connecticut. I reviewed my graduate coursework from the University of Michigan on social work, human connections, counseling, and social skill development.
After revisiting these topics, I started to testing little things like eye contact, and small talk, and it slowly began to work. I starting becoming more comfortable with being uncomfortable.
Today, I'm still running tests, and trying things with the goal of discarding my social anxiety.
I'm happy to say I've made some great progress. I'm not perfect, I still get nervous and anxious about things, but I don't allow those things to control me anymore. In fact, I'm finding out that a lot of the fears I used to have, are never as scary as I thought.
I've learned how to make progress by taking small steps each day. I also learned to accept my fears while embracing confidence and courage. I realized that if I wanted to make lasting changes in my life, it wouldn't always be easy, but it would always be worth it.
Over the past two years, I've learned so much that I wanted to start sharing it with other people like me. Guys who are struggling with not reaching their potential, building relationships, and not working toward the things they really want, because of their social anxiety and fear.
That’s why I started Discarded Anxiety. Not only to help people overcome social anxiety and fear but to help people live their best life.
What's Your Best Life?
What's your answer to that question?
Perhaps you're thinking about being rich and able to afford any and everything you want. That would be really cool.
But, is that really your best life?
How about the ability to communicate your thoughts and feelings so clearly that you know the person you're talking to understands you.
What about being able to nail the job interview or speak up at the meeting at work without fear keeping you from giving your best effort?
How about being able to go out to that party and not be worried about what you're going to say or who you're going to talk to?
What does your best life really look like?
For me, it's not about the money (although money is great). It's not about being famous and having all the things I want to have.
My best life is about having the confidence and courage to go after the things that I want without allowing my anxiety and fear to hold me back.
My best life is about applying for the job because I want it and not limiting myself because I may not have all the skills. It's about taking the chance to learn new things, be vulnerable, and grow as a person.
It's about taking the chance to learn new things, be vulnerable, and grow as a person.
My best life is about taking action to reach my goals instead of daydreaming about what it could be like but never doing anything to make it a reality.
That may not sound like much to some of you and if that's the case, perhaps this isn't the blog for you. But I'm certain that some of you resonate with this. You know deep down that to go after you big ideas and carry out your dreams, you just need a little confidence and the sky's the limit.
But I'm certain that some of you resonate with this. You know deep down that to go after you big ideas and carry out your dreams, you just need a someone to show you the steps to take to get there.
If this resonates with you, you're in the right place.
What You’ll Find Here
Through the blog, you’ll learn how social anxiety really works and what small but significant changes you can make in your life to start overcoming your anxiety. Most blog posts will have action steps for you to take designed to help you practice the skills you need to overcome social anxiety in some small way.
Most blog posts will have action steps for you to take designed to help you practice the skills you need to overcome social anxiety in some small way.
In addition to blog posts, you can also take part in challenges to help add the best strategies into your daily life. The challenges and activities will be given out to my email list subscribers.
Click here to sign up. My emails will also have additional information, including private videos, and content that will be exclusively for subscribers.
If you join my email list, you will also be given additional content, including private videos, custom worksheets, word for word scripts, and much more just for subscribers.
Plus, you won’t be alone. As a reader of Discarded Anxiety, you’ll become a part of our thriving community of readers who are taking this journey alongside you. Feel free to share your thought, feelings, and questions in the comments of any blog post. I respond to every comment and love interacting with you.
As a reader of Discarded Anxiety, you’ll become a part of our thriving community of Social Anxiety Fighters who are taking this journey alongside you. Feel free to share your thought, feelings, and questions in the comments of any blog post. I respond to every comment and love interacting with you.
Here are 3 of my most shared articles:
We’re in This Together
If you are fed up with your social anxiety and have decided that you don't want to be held back by fear anymore, you're in the right place.
We believe that our best life is possible and we don’t want to waste any more time letting our negative thoughts and fears control us.
The goal of this blog is to help you cultivate courage, build your confidence, and live your best life.
Let's take this journey together.